Is it even possible to get out of people pleaser prison? The answer to that question lies in the fact that you must first recognize that you are in a prison that you have created for yourself. You make others more important to you. You are proud of the fact that you know better than others of what will make them happy. You are always focusing on the needs of others. You may even believe that by making other people happy, you will be happy. You never ask for anything in return because you assume others will just know what you need.
You make a lot of people happy being a people pleaser. Others love having you around because you always get the job done because you want others to like you. The downside to being a people pleaser is that you never get your needs met and often you will end up exhausted and resentful.
Balance is the key to happiness. To break out of people pleaser prison is to understand that you are also a person who has needs and wants. Pleasing others is wonderful if you can do it without expecting anything in return. The question is: When do you take time out for yourself? When do you ask for your needs to be met? When do you do something that makes you feel happy? When do you start doing things and stop worrying about what others think? When do you start listening and honoring the signals that you are receiving from your body? When do you rest and take care of yourself? What do you really want?
Pleasing others is a good idea if it is something you want to do because you choose to. Pleasing others is not a good idea just to get them to like you. You have to understand the difference so that you can change the way you react around people. A good place to start is by asking answering some of the questions above.
Changing your habits or way of thinking and feeling must be a conscious effort and it can be done with time and effort from you. Positive thinking will also help because this will help you start to see that you are important as an individual no matter what anyone else thinks.
By knowing what will make you happy will increase your self worth. You are the one that has to start seeing value in yourself in order to get yourself out of this prison. What you think and feel about yourself and whether you like yourself as a person is much more essential than what others believe about you.
Remember that you train others how to treat you. Once you are able to realize that you matter, no matter what anyone else says, you will find yourself not being so bent on always pleasing others.
One very important thing you need to do to get out of your prison is to find the root of your problem. There are many roots that can be causing you to feel like you always have to please others in order to get them to like you. You need to determine what is causing you to feel this way so you can start to change it.
Some of the different roots that could be causing your problem include:
– Not feeling loved or wanted
– Fear of being alone or even abandoned
– Rejection fear
– Feeling like you are not good enough
These are just some of the problems that could be causing you to always feel like you have to please others. Understanding the root of your problem will help you know what steps need to be taken to change how you feel.
Remember that if you really want out of people pleaser prison, then you have to change your way of thinking and start understanding that you are a very important person in your own right. It will take time and effort from you, but it will be well worth it when you can get of your prison that you have been living in for far too long already and get away from the exhaustion caused by your prison.