Building self confidence is a great contribution that we, as parents, can give our children. But sometimes parents do not realize that the words that they use can be very demoralising.
Negative words are said and can crumble a child’s self esteem in a matter of minutes and over time can destroy a child mentally.
Think just for a moment, when was the last time you spoke to your child? Can you remember the words that you used? Were they negative or positive?
It is a challenge to think about, isn’t it?
Take a look at these phrases, sound familiar?
- “I do not want to see your face again, go to your room.”
- “Haven’t you cleaned that room yet? Take a look at your brothers, why can’t you be like him?”
- “That dress looks a bit tight, haven’t you got a better one to wear?”
Children hear this and can take it as being that they are ugly, unpleasant to look at. Their self esteem becomes very low and they begin to have trouble with their self image.
Comparing him to other siblings will weaken confidence and they can withdraw and become depressed.
This sounds as though the child is a little to fat, imagine the affects this can have on a young teenager. Self image is wiped out.
These are some negative phrases that can destroy a child psychologically and self esteem diminishes quickly with ever word spoken.
Improve self confidence in children by using positive words such as-
“I am so proud of you, I am glad you’re my son.”
“I love the way you did your hair today.”
“Thanks for all your help today, it looks great.”
“Great move, you had better teach your old man that.”
“I knew you could do it, I love you.”
Say these words over and over in your head. How does it make you feel? Uplifted, proud and happy, also the most important emotion of all, is loved.
Always think about what you are going to say before it comes out of your mouth. Think about how you would like to be spoken to at work and by other people. You would not like to be put down in front of your peers or down graded, so think how a child would feel in the same situation.
Always praise children and tell them how pleased you are of them for just being themselves. Reminding them of all the positive things in their life.
Progressing through life is difficult in this world and it can be very daunting. With the problems that are encountered, using positive words instead of negative words will build self confidence in children and dealing with life’s difficulties will be a lot easier.
Remember one important thing. Love unconditionally, hug and kiss your children every day and reinforce your love for them.